one year

August 1, 2010. That was the day I landed at the Mactan International Airport in Cebu for the first time in my life. I stepped out the door, on my phone, my eyes searching, my heart not knowing what to expect. Then I saw them. These people who picked me up. These people who, except for my grandma (lola in Cebuano), I was meeting for the first time in my life. And these people were my family.

the group that picked me up from the airport

Having an Asian half to my family has taught me a lot about, well, family. In the States, my cousins and I could probably care less about each other. We're all living our lives; I've played with them once or twice when I was little. There hasn't much built up, and that's OK. It's OK to prioritize those present in your life. I've discovered that here in the Philippines, my cousins could almost care more! They consider me their sister; in Cebuano I'm literally addressed as "older sister" (ate [ah-tee]). I matter to them, whether or not I'm physically present in their lives, and they love me. And I love them.

This last year, my family in Cebu became a part of my life. I visited them for three weeks last summer in August (you can look at my pictures on facebook - I posted two albums: Discovering my other half & Discovering my other half II). It was three weeks of culture shock (you can read my blog, "culture shock").

Those three weeks began a new chapter of my life; ironically, those three weeks also began the final year of my Lola's time here on earth.

me and lola - August 1, 2010

I visited Cebu two other times this last year. Once over Chinese New Year in February and then again just last month in July. A different course of events brought me back the third time; it even brought my mother to Asia. This course of events was Lola's health.

Things in Cebu had gotten really serious. In the States, my mom was receiving phone calls and urgent messages about hospital bills and medicine and her mother being extremely sick. I was receiving reports via facebook about my grandma being in the hospital and receiving blood transfusions. My mother decided she needed to fly to Cebu herself and see what was going on. So that's what she did. After her first two weeks in the Philippines, she flew to Taipei to spend a few days with me and see my life here in Taiwan. It had been two years since I had seen my mom (see my pictures on facebook: The MOM in TAIPEI & CEBU and Surprise Party for Mom and watch Surprising the mom!).

My mom and I together after 2 years

After her few days with me in Taiwan, we returned to Cebu together; since after I had found out about the whole situation of Lola's health and that my mother was going to be there, I decided I would also make the trip. Once we got to the Philippines, my mom and I started out in Bohol, to continue our mother-daughter bonding portion of the trip (read my note "Bad News and Good News" and watch these two videos: That was a close one. & Getting there: half the journey). While we were in Bohol, my mom got a phone call that called us back to Cebu a day early.

The 3 Generations - July 24, 2011

In Cebu, I spent some of my Lola's last days with her here on earth, taking care of her, feeding her, changing her diaper, singing to her, listening to her cry out in pain and making her last requests, break out in to song, and pray to her Creator. I was also witness to the many people that were drawn to my grandmother, watching them pray for her and encourage her (watch "For Lola", a video compilation I created of her last days in Cebu). My mom and I both left her knowing that it was only a matter of time. We just didn't know when.

I returned to Taiwan and my mom flew back to the States on July 29th.

Barely two days after returning, I received notification of my grandmother's death as I was walking out of church that Sunday afternoon. She had passed away on July 30th, at 3:30 in the afternoon. I booked a ticket back to Cebu that night.

August 1, 2011. One year after the first time I ever came to Cebu and saw my grandma for the first time after 10 years. I landed at the Mactan International Airport in Cebu at 8 o'clock in the morning after flying all night from Taipei. I took a taxi to Talisay Bible Baptist Church, where they were keeping Lola's body. The funeral service and the burial started at one that afternoon. One of my grandma's last requests was that video be taken at her funeral and remembered as "Mommy's Journey to Heaven." So that's what I did. I documented the even so that it could be remembered forever (see "Mommy's Journey to Heaven", the picture album version).

I wrote to a close friend in an email today,

"As soon as I arrived at the Talisay Bible Baptist Church in Cebu the next morning around 9am, I knew I was supposed to be there. That Monday was one of the most emotionally intense days of my life. I think seeing everyone else's tears made me hold mine back. It was my first funeral. I freaked out when I saw my grandma's dead body. It wasn't her.

And I guess that's the joy and beauty hidden in all of this. That body in the coffin wasn't my grandma. My grandma is in heaven."

I will remember my Lola forever, and so will so many other people she knew while she was here on this earth. And she will always be one of my greatest reminders of the words from Philippians 1:21: "TO LIVE IS CHRIST, AND TO DIE IS GAIN."

See you in Heaven, Lola.